Quotes of Funny Money - somelinesforyou

“ When I was young I thought that money was the most important thing in life; now that I am old I know that it is. ”

- Oscar Wilde

“ Money is something you have to make in case you don’t die. ”

- Max Asnas

“ Money, if it does not bring you happiness, will at least help you be miserable in comfort. ”

- Helen Gurley Brown

“ Don’t stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed. ”

- George Burns

“ Money is better than poverty, if only for financial reasons. ”

- Woody Allen

“ Save a little money each month and at the end of the year you’ll be surprised at how little you have. ”

- Ernest Haskins

“ Money isn’t the most important thing in life, but it’s reasonably close to oxygen on the ‘gotta have it’ scale. ”

- Zig Ziglar

“ Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I’m not there, I go to work. ”

- Robert Orben

“ I got 99 problems and money could solve at least 73 of them. ”

- Unknown

“ If you can count your money, you don’t have a billion dollars. ”

- J. Paul Getty

“ I’ll do a lot of things for money, but I draw the line at working. ”

- Unknown

“ Money talks. Mine is always saying ‘Spend me!’ ”

- Tom Wilson

“ Always borrow money from a pessimist, he doesn’t expect to be paid back. ”

- Unknown

“ You say love is more important than money. Have you ever tried paying your bills with a hug? ”

- Unknown

“ All I ask is the chance to prove that money can’t make me happy. ”

- Spike Milligan

“ I cannot afford to waste my time making money. ”

- Louis Agassiz

“ Nothing saves money like being antisocial! ”

- Unknown

“ Money is the best deodorant. ”

- Elizabeth Taylor

“ Las Vegas is the only place I know where money really talks–it says, ‘Goodbye.’ ”

- Frank Sinatra

“ Dear Millionaires, if you don’t even have a bookshelf that spins into another room, give me your money because you’re spending it wrong. ”

- Unknown

“ A nickel ain’t worth a dime anymore. ”

- Yogi Berra

“ The safe way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket. ”

- Frank Hubbard

“ There are three faithful friends – an old wife, an old dog, and ready money. ”

- Benjamin Franklin

“ Anyone who lives within their means suffers from imagination. ”

- Oscar Wilde

“ I have enough money to live comfortably for the rest of my life… If I die next Tuesday. ”

- Unknown

“ Money doesn’t talk, it swears obscenity. ”

- Bob Dylan

“ Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money. ”

- Jackie Mason

“ I am having an out of money experience. ”

- Unknown

“ Money won’t buy happiness, but it will pay the salaries of a large research staff to study the problem. ”

- Bill Vaughan

“ I wish my wallet was as fat as I am. ”

- Unknown
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