Quotes of Roseanne - somelinesforyou

“ Comedy is the only hope for humanity. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his chest. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ The quickest way to a man’s heart is through his chest. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I’ve done my job. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ In Tulsa, restaurants have signs that say, 'Sorry, we're open.'. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Chili represents your three stages of matter: solid, liquid, and eventually gas. ”

- Roseanne

“ I loved work and I loved pouring myself into the work, you know. It was the real life that I had trouble with. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ I will clean house when Sears comes out with a riding vacuum cleaner. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a hell of a lot more to being a mother than most people suspect. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ There's a lot more to being a woman than being a mother, but there's a hell of a lot more to being a mother than most people suspect. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Chili represents your three stages of matter: solid, liquid, and eventually gas. ”

- Roseanne

“ The quickest way to a man's heart is through his chest. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself. ”

- Roseanne

“ Chili represents your three stages of matter: solid, liquid, and eventually gas. ”

- Roseanne

“ I was completely nuts for most of my life. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ The one who cares the most wins… That's how I knew I'd end up with everyone else waving the white flags and not me. That's how I knew I'd be the last person standing when it was all over… I cared the most. ”

- Roseanne

“ I hate the word housewife; I don't like the word home-maker either. I want to be called Domestic Goddess. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ My daughter made me a Jerry Springer-watching kit, with crackers, Cheez Whiz, polyester stretch pants and a T-shirt with two fat women fighting over a skinny guy. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself. ”

- Roseanne

“ Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ As a housewife, I feel that if the kids are still alive when my husband gets home from work, then hey, I've done my job. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Beauty comes in all sizes, not just size 5. ”

- Roseanne

“ Women complain about premenstrual syndrome, but I think of it as the only time of the month that I can be myself. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ I hate the word housewife; I don't like the word home-maker either. I want to be called Domestic Goddess. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ I figure that if the children are alive when I get home, I've done my job. ”

- Roseanne Barr

“ Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with. ”

- Roseanne Barr
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