Quotes of Computers

“ The computing field is always in need of new cliches. ”

- Alan Perlis

“ Computers make it easier to do a lot of things, but most of the things they make it easier to do don't need to be done. ”

- Andy Rooney

“ The great thing about a computer notebook is that no matter how much you stuff into it, it doesn't get bigger or heavier. ”

- Bill Gates

“ If computers get too powerful, we can organize them into a committee -- that will do them in. ”

- Gandhi

“ Why is it drug addicts and computer afficionados are both called users? ”

- Clifford Stoll

“ My computer beat me at chess... so I beat it at kickboxing. ”

- Demetri Martin

“ Home computers are being called upon to perform many new functions, including the consumption of homework formerly eaten by the dog. ”

- Doug Larson

“ Computer Science is no more about computers than astronomy is about telescopes. ”

- E. W. Dijkstra

“ The question of whether a computer can think is no more interesting than the question of whether a submarine can swim. ”

- E. W. Dijkstra

“ Not even computers will replace committees, because committees buy computers. ”

- Edward Shepherd Mead

“ To err is human, but to really foul things up requires a computer. ”

- Gandhi

“ Compromise used to mean that half a loaf was better than no bread. Among modern statesmen it really seems to mean that half a loaf is better than a whole loaf. ”

- G. K. Chesterton

“ Most people believe that if you go in and try to micromanage a forest, it is possible to destroy the very thing that makes it a unique and special place. That's just as true of the Net. ”

- Glen Raphael

“ I do not fear computers. I fear the lack of them. ”

- Isaac Asimov

“ Part of the inhumanity of the computer is that, once it is competently programmed and working smoothly, it is completely honest. ”

- Isaac Asimov

“ Computers can figure out all kinds of problems, except the things in the world that just don't add up. ”

- James Magary

“ Imagine if every Thursday your shoes exploded if you tied them the usual way. This happens to us all the time with computers, and nobody thinks of complaining. ”

- Jef Raskin

“ The most overlooked advantage to owning a computer is that if they foul up there's no law against wacking them around a little. ”

- Joe Martin

“ One would think that if you're anonymous, you'd do anything you want, but groups have their own sense of community and what we can do. ”

- John Allen

“ In all large corporations, there is a pervasive fear that someone, somewhere is having fun with a computer on company time. Networks help alleviate that fear. ”

- John C. Dvorak

“ There is no reason for any individual to have a computer in his home. ”

- Ken Olsen

“ No computer has ever been designed that is ever aware of what it's doing; but most of the time, we aren't either. ”

- Marvin Minsky

“ The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident. That's where we come in; we're computer professionals. We cause accidents. ”

- Nathaniel Borenstein

“ Computers are useless. They can only give you answers. ”

- Pablo Picasso

“ The computer is a moron. ”

- Peter Drucker

“ If you put tomfoolery into a computer, nothing comes out of it but tomfoolery. But this tomfoolery, having passed through a very expensive machine, is somehow ennobled and no-one dares criticize it. ”

- Pierre Gallois

“ Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build bigger and better idiot-proof programs, and the Universe trying to produce bigger and better idiots. So far, the Universe is winning. ”

- Rick Cook

“ To err is human--and to blame it on a computer is even more so. ”

- Robert Orben

“ If the automobile had followed the same development cycle as the computer, a Rolls-Royce would today cost $100, get a million miles per gallon, and explode once a year, killing everyone inside. ”

- Robert X. Cringely

“ I think computer viruses should count as life. I think it says something about human nature that the only form of life we have created so far is purely destructive. We've created life in our own image. ”

- Stephen Hawking
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