Quotes of Ellen Degeneres

“ Most comedy is based on getting a laugh at somebody else’s expense. And I find that that’s just a form of bullying in a major way. So I want to be an example that you can be funny and be kind, and make people laugh without hurting somebody else’s feelings. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Money can buy you a fine dog, but only love can make him wag his tail. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Beauty for some provides escape, who gain a happiness in eyeing the gorgeous buttocks of the ape or Autumn sunsets exquisitely dying. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ I ask people why they have deer heads on their walls. They always say because it’s such a beautiful animal. There you go. I think my mother is attractive, but I have photographs of her. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ You know, it’s hard work to write a book. I can’t tell you how many times I really get going on an idea, then my quill breaks. Or I spill ink all over my writing tunic. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety-seven now, and we don’t know where the heck she is. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ I think there's too much mult-tasking going on. I think people need to quiet down and focus and be still more ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Don't give advice. It will come back and bite you in the [butt]. Don't take anyone's advice. So, my advice to you is to be true to yourself and everything will be fine. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ What you look like on the outside is not what makes you cool at all. I mean, I had a mullet and wore parachute pants for a long, long time, and I'm doin' okay. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ I didn't go to college at all, any college, and I'm not saying you wasted your time or money, but look at me, I'm a huge celebrity. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Life is like one big Mardi Gras. But instead of showing your boobs, show people your brain, and if they like what they'll, you'll have more beads than you know what to do with. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ If someone says you’re weird, say “thank you”. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ My life is perfect even when it’s not. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Procrastinate now, don’t put it off. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ It makes a big difference in your life when you stay positive. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ I say always follow your passion, no matter what, because even if it’s not the same financial success, it’ll lead you to the money that’ll make you the happiest. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ I wanted to have money; I wanted to be special; I wanted people to like me; I wanted to be famous. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ When you take risks you learn that there will be times when you succeed and there will be times when you fail, and both are equally important. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ It’s failure that gives you the proper perspective on success. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ People always ask me, ‘Were you funny as a child?’ Well, no, I was an accountant. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ People always ask me, ‘Were you funny as a child?’ Well, no, I was an accountant. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Accept who you are. Unless you’re a serial killer. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ My grandmother started walking five miles a day when she was sixty. She’s ninety. seven now, and we don’t know where the hell she is. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres

“ Follow your passion, stay true to yourself, never follow someone else’s path unless you’re in the woods and you’re lost and you see a path then by all means you should follow that. ”

- Ellen DeGeneres
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