Quotes of Jack Handey

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If you work on a lobster boat, sneaking up behind someone and pinching him is probably a joke that gets old real fast.

- Jack Handey

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“ You can’t go back and make a new start, but you can start right now and make a brand new ending. ”

- James R. Sherman

“ Unrequited love’s a bore. ”

- Lorenz Hart

“ If every life is a river, then it's little wonder that we do not even notice the changes that occur until we are far out in the darkest sea. One day you look around and nothing is familiar, not even your own face. My name once meant daughter, grandaughter, friend, sister, beloved. Now those words mean only what their letters spell out; Star in the night sky. Truth in the darkness. I have crossed over to a place where I never thought I'd be. I am someone I would have never imagined. A secret. A dream. I am this, body and soul. Burn me. Drown me. Tell me lies. I will still be who I am. ”

- Alice Hoffman

“ Confusion, obsession, and potential love walk handinhand. ”

- Ashli and Trisha Edwards

“ When people think they know you and put you in a box, keep growing and give them the box. ”

- Jackie Griffin

“ The little unremembered acts of kindness and love are the best parts of a person’s life. ”

- William Wordsworth

“ Bagiku ada sesuatu yang paling berharga dan hakiki dalam kehidupan: 'dapat mencintai, dapat iba hati, dapat merasai kedukaan'. Tanpa itu semua maka kita tidak lebih dari benda. Berbahagialah orang yang masih mempunyai rasa cinta, yang belum sampai kehilangan benda yang paling bernilai itu. Kalau kita telah kehilangan itu maka absurdlah hidup kita. ”

- Soe Hok Gie

“ Love is like the measles. The older you get it, the worse the attack. ”

- Mary Roberts Rinehart

“ Love doesn't just sit there, like a stone, it has to be made, like bread; remade all the time, made new. ”

- Ursula K. Le Guin

“ Sometimes love means letting go when you want to hold on tighter. ”

- Melissa Marr

“ Love life and life will love you back. Love people and they will love you back. ”

- Arthur Rubenstein

“ The past can't hurt you anymore. Not unless you let it. They made you into a victim, Evey. They made you into a statistic. But, that's not the real you. That's not who you are inside. ”

- Alan Moore

“ Better to have, and not need, than to need, and not have. ”

- Franz Kafka

“ Such is my relationship with God: on my gigantic canvass of life, I am the one throwing all of the brightlycolored paints, creating genuine splatters, authentic whirlpools of color, beautiful patterns, wonderful streaks and stains and wild accents; God is the one with the paintbrush who stands beside my canvass filling all the intricate and amazing details in between the whirlpools and the streaks! We're happy together! ”

- C. JoyBell C.

“ I miss your voice because it is a symphony; your scent because it is a treasure; your smile because it is a jewel; your hug because it is a masterpiece; and your kiss because it is a miracle. ”

- Matshona Dhliwayo

“ True love is not so much a matter of romance as it is a matter of anxious concern for the wellbeing of one's companion. ”

- Gordon B. Hinckley

“ Sometimes the hardest one to see . . .is the one standing right before you. ”

- Lenora Porch

“ Tragedy and adversary are the stones we sharpen our swords against so we can fight new battles. ”

- Sherrilyn Kenyon

“ Mistakes are not bad; excuses are. ”

- Udai Yadla

“ Sometimes what seems so right turns out wrong and what seems so wrong turns out right. What do I call this phenomenon? Life. ”

- Charles F. Glassman

“ Art and love are the same thing: It’s the process of seeing yourself in things that are not you. ”

- Chuck Klosterman

“ Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely. ”

- Roy T. Bennett

“ The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work. ”

- Émile Zola