“ A painful situation arrives in your Life simply because it was meant to. It is never because your “energies are negative” or that you are being “punished for past sins”. Your pain is here to teach you Life lessons. Which is why extraordinary pain is a sign of grace, of a great teacher arriving in your Life to transform you, to make you resilient, wise and happy! ”
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“ Permanence is an illusion. Nothing lasts. When this awareness arrives in your Life, you awaken to Happiness – to embracing what is, to finding meaning and Purpose in what is and to be content with what is. ”
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“ Faith is not a ‘thing’ you have in an external God that you have been conditioned to worship. Faith is simply trusting the process of Life. You are because of Life, because you are alive. So, if you have been given this lifetime, in this human form, without your even asking to be born, trust that you will get all that you need and you will eventually reach where you must arrive. And until you see Life’s magic and beauty, until you realize that it is what it is, be Patient with the process of Life. Which is why, Faith and Patience are truly the most empowering keywords or philosophies in Life. When you have Faith and Patience, Life is beautiful, just the way it is! ”
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“ Whatever it is, take it as it comes. This is surely never easy. But when you understand that you can’t win fighting Life, you will realize that this is the only option. So, going with the flow is not quite a spiritual or romantic, feelgood, concept as it is made out to be. It is an intelligent choice, driven by plain common sense, of doing what you possibly can in a given situation. When you awaken to this truth, you will be happy despite your circumstances. ”
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“ Understand a simple truth about Life: you have to go through what you have to go through! No amount of praying or wishing can change what you have to, and will, experience in Life. So, stop resisting anything that you dislike and are faced with. The role of a crisis is to make you stronger, wiser and, interestingly, happy. Look back at all that you have been through and you will find that you are better from your experiences. So, why be bitter about whatever’s happening to you now? Embrace your current reality, accept it as your new normal, and keep doing what you can possibly do each given day. Over time, you will find yourself soaked in equanimity, no matter how hard the going is! ”
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“ When someone chooses not to understand you, despite your best efforts, you may want to examine whether they are not getting what you are saying or if they simply don’t want to understand you. If it is the latter, Life is so much simpler for both of you – there is no need to invest any more time and energy in striving for that understanding. The brutal truth that you often fail to confront is the fact that someone who is keen not to understand you, perhaps never will, no matter how hard you try! ”
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“ Don’t wish that your Life is different from what it is now. This is how you invite suffering into your Life. What is happening to you has already arrived in your Life. You can’t wish it away, you can’t undo it, you can’t deny its presence. By asking why is something happening in your Life, you are resisting your current reality. That’s also why you are suffering. Instead, learn to be nonsuffering by embracing what is. Being nonsuffering is a personal choice, it holds the key to your Happiness! ”
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“ Purpose, Vision and Values are crucial to the journey of Life. Why are you doing what you are doing (Purpose), where are you headed (Vision) and what guiding principles (Values) will you never compromise on? When you are clear about these aspects of your Life then the result does not matter. Yes, there will be times you will get what you want, but that Success will sit lightly on you. And in the times when you don’t get what you want, Failure will not torment you, it will not weigh you down. Being unmoved by both Failure and Success is the only art you need to master to get through Life; this is what leads you to being happy despite the circumstances. ”
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“ How would you do what you are doing if there was no reward, no goal, no measure of Success or Failure attached to it? How would you perform if you only focused on doing something for the joy of doing it? When you live Life, working only for joy, then neither Success nor Failure can hold you hostage. Of course, please demand a premium for your service or offering in the commercial market, but please don’t fall into the trap of valuing what you do only on economic or material parameters. When you enjoy the journey and realize that it is the only reward, you will never be keyed up over the outcomes. This is the way to a perennial state of Happiness, to Bliss! ”
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“ You have to be clear that, often times, in fact almost always, despite your best efforts, perfection and success may elude you. So, the only way to stay anchored, and at peace with yourself and with your world, is to embrace what is. If you tried hard, if you put in your best, just celebrate the process of trying, of doing your best…leave the results and outcomes to Life. You can never get a perfect 10! And what you have is what it is. When you embrace this idea and live your Life, you will never be keyed up over the outcomes. You will enjoy the process, above all. And that is the key to your Happiness! ”
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“ When you start viewing another person’s Life and wonder “how’s it that they are having a good time when I am not?”, well then, you have invited suffering into your own Life! Be sure…1. You don’t know their story and don’t quite know if they are really having a ‘good’ time and 2. It’s their Life and another person’s Life is none of your business! Seriously. So, to be happy, stop comparing yourself with others. Period. ”
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“ Dealing with toxic people is an art that can be learnt. Whether it is in a family, among friends or at the workplace, exercise a choice to establish and maintain clear contours of your relationship with such people. Define very clearly in your mind what about this person irks you. And draw the line there. The point is not whether others can get along with such people, the point is that you cannot suffer them. So, when others ask you to be “adjusting”, you must tell them why you can’t do this – that it affects your inner peace. Once you define and draw the boundaries clearly, barring the initial settling in issues, pretty soon, everyone will see value in your approach. Clearly, there’s no point sacrificing your Happiness for another’s behavior or your reluctance to call them out! ”
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“ Whatever be your current reality, you are never in conflict with it. Life is happening to you. And you are going with the flow. A health challenge, a breakup, the loss of a loved one, a careerrelated complication, a messy financial situation, whatever you are dealing with, you are doing pretty fine living with what is. However, the moment your mind plays up an expectation that your Life must be different from what it is now, suffering kicks in. So, clearly, suffering comes from expectations. And you cause your expectations. The solution, therefore, to avoid suffering is to drop all expectations. Embrace your current reality, do what you can do in the given context and keep moving… ”
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“ Life serves us all wakeup calls at different times. Through experiences, events, conversations. You can surely turn off the alarm clock and go back to sleep, which is you can ignore the call, but you can’t deny that it is time you woke up. What is interesting is that if you don’t heed the wakeup call the first time, Life will come back and knock you on your head again and again. It is your choice to process that stimuli or not that makes all the difference. ”
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“ Life is eventually about things, people, relationships, projects, opportunities money, health and even memories all of them being taken away from you! Life is about constantly embracing new normals, it is about finding meaning, Purpose, beauty and Happiness in what is! ”
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“ True enlightenment arrives the moment you understand the difference between your wants and your needs. When you awaken to this understanding, you will realize that Life has always been providing for you, caring for you, giving you all that you need. This is how you stop wanting anything, anymore and start living with what you have, with what is. This is how you learn to be happy despite your circumstances. ”
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“ Once you understand the power of meditation, you don’t even need to engage in it as a practice. You don’t need to then set aside a particular time of the day for meditation as an activity. In that state, you are that; you are meditative in everything that you do. There is a mindful, immersive quality to your Life then. Surely, debilitating emotions and disturbing thoughts will come calling, but your awareness, your mindfulness, helps you to not pick them up. You see them, you feel them, but you let them pass. This discerning ability to choose wisely is the biggest gift that meditation delivers. This is what helps you to be happy despite your circumstances. ”
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“ What others think of you, or what they say or do to you, is their business; not yours! They have a right to their opinions. And you must just let them be. It is when you try to change their opinion of you that you grieve – and often suffer. Instead, be unmoved by their choices, their utterances, and just be true to yourself. You will then be fearless and unaffected by all that is happening around you. ”
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“ Life, at the end of the day, is a simple mindgame. This means, essentially, that you learn to control your thoughts, that you learn to be nonworrying, nonfrustrated and nonsuffering. Then, no matter what you are going through, you live a better, fuller, happy Life. ”
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“ Failure is an event. A mere data point. You tried something. And it didn’t work out. But society makes it looks like a crime. The label of Failure that is pinned on you is far more burdensome than the act of failing itself. So, the simplest thing to do is to not let that label stick; peel it off and chuck it away! For the same reason, don’t take Success too seriously either. Life happens through you, not because of you! Your success is not your own doing; it is Life’s longing for expressing itself through you. And when you fail, it is Life’s way of teaching you more about itself, about the fact that Life, not you, is in control! ”
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“ Make your Bliss the reason why you live and then watch the magic unfold. All that you need will flow to you on its own! Every single time!!! ”
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“ When your work becomes your prayer, Life becomes meaningful. We are conditioned to imagine that work is a means to earn a living. But what if you made your work the reason why you live, the raison d’etre for your Happiness, for your living? Think: how happy you possibly can be when what you do every day is your prayer, your selfless offering to a Higher Energy, to the creator. Simply, instead of making money the object, make your work your prayer and strive for worldclass excellence…money, over time, will eventually flow to you, just as everything you need will! ”
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“ Train your mind to be nonworrying, nonfrustrated and nonsuffering. And then feel the difference. Nonworrying does not mean that worries will not arise; it means you won't pick up a worry and give it any attention or power. Nonfrustrated does not mean inaction or resignation; it means you will not feel defeated when your efforts to fix whatever you want changed in your Life repeatedly come unstuck. And nonsuffering does not mean you are free from pain; it means you have learned to colive with extreme pain by choosing to not ask 'why' or 'why me'. Now, when you are nonworrying, nonfrustrated and nonsuffering, you are happy. Simple. ”
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“ When you are wronged by someone, you have two options: either fight back or walk away. Now, if you can forgive and move on, walk way. But if you will grieve and suffer forever that feeling of having been violated and shortchanged, fight. But don’t fight if it will make you wallow in a maze of debilitating emotions – anger, grief, fear, insecurity, worry, hatred…such a fight that drains you of all your goodness, and which leaves you cold and numb, is simply not worth it. But if you don’t fight the good fight, understandably, the cause will be lost. And that’s sacrilege. So, the key is to practice detached determination. Fight with focus and strategy and fight calmly, happily! Fight with detachment – don’t cling on to your desired outcomes, don’t set deadlines. Simply fight. When you fight the good fight, with equanimity and a sense of Purpose, the outcome never matters. The fact that you stood up and fought does. ”
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“ Being happy professionally is really the ability to do what you love doing the way you want to do it. Which is, if you have a natural talent and you have honed it to a worldclass standard, you want the creative and professional space to express this talent your way. However, because your customers – both paying customers and society at large – want to control what they want from you, there may be times when you feel suffocated and unhappy. Ask yourself: is it worth doing something for money or social acclaim/validation at the cost of your inner peace or Happiness? If the answer to this question is ‘no’ – choose to be ‘humbly ruthless’. Be unflinching and nonnegotiable on your professional and creative standards. Yet take that position with all humility, knowing fully well that someone else may fulfil that need for your customer should you opt out. Surprisingly though, 9 times out of 10, people may come back and work with you. The one deal that breaks off may have never made you happy; so, really, no sweat there! This is the key to Happiness – being ‘humbly ruthless’! ”
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“ Apna Time Ayega’ is perhaps a way to console yourself when you don’t get what you want but you see all others around you getting ‘success, fame and money’. But wait! What’s wrong with having to toil longer for what you want and experience delays and denials while honing your creativity, your skills and your art? What is wrong with enjoying the process of doing what makes you come alive? Actually, it is this process, this journey, that counts more than arriving at some place, proving to someone or getting something! There is no right time in the future. This moment, now, this is the only time you have – because the past is dead and the future is not yet born. This is always the right time. So, instead of sighing and saying ‘Apna Time Ayega’, flip the paradigm, say: ‘Yehi Hai Right Time, Baby! ”
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“ When you are confronted with many problems at the same time, don’t be overwhelmed or emotional and attempt to solve all of them at the same time. You simply can’t. Approach your problems with basic project management skills. Sort your problems into different buckets: A. which ones cannot be solved ever B. which ones cannot be solved by you C. which ones can be solved by you over time and D. which ones can be solved by you immediately? Obviously, go to work today on bucket D, while planning to schedule time and collaborations to address buckets C and B. Of course, learn to accept those in bucket A with humility and equanimity and move on. This is the only way you can focus sharply, be calm and find strength in a storm and be happy! ”
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“ When you wish pain and suffering on someone who wronged you, what is actually happening is that you are still cooking within yourself. You are the one who is suffering. And you are expressing this suffering by wishing that your perpetrator must also suffer. Now, this reaction is normal; it is human to feel this way. But if you pause and reflect quietly, you will see the futility of causing your own suffering. If you must fight your perpetrator legally, do that. But do that dispassionately, without acrimony; let it simply be a clinical process. You don’t have to even forgive the person if you really are not feeling like it yet. But stop wishing that they suffer. That’s a big step forward in your own healing. When you take this step, over time, you will realize that Life always serves retribution at its own pace and that nothing liberates you as much as forgiveness does! ”
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“ Grief is an important emotion. Don’t suppress it. Go through the process of grieving as long as you feel it is important and necessary for you to grieve. Don’t let people tell you that to grieve is being weak or being depressive. Hardly. Choose your own way of expressing your grief. If you must cry, cry. If you prefer being silent, be that way. But whatever you do, remember that grief when carried for too long in you becomes a burden. Then it begins to cause your suffering. So, at some point, hold up your grief and examine it. Is it serving any Purpose? Is the process of grieving comforting you or is it making you feel miserable? The moment you realize the futility of clinging on to grief, you will set it down. This will set you free. You will then be happy despite the circumstances. ”
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